sanity vs. family
Nov. 27th, 2005 03:06 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
akainagiI'm beginning to think mental health and my family are mutually exclusive.
So I get a call from my uncle, *again*. It starts off fine, but then degenerates into something like this ....
J: So how much do you weigh now?
Me: J, I love you, I really do, but that's not really any of your business.
J: Damn right it's my business. I know what your problem is ...
Me: No, it's not really your business.
J: Your problem is all in your head. You don't need that therapist. What you need is to push yourself away from the table.
Me: Jimmy, I love you, but you're being really insulting right now.
J: You need to get back to where you were a couple years ago when I met you coming off the plane. You looked great.
Me: J, I really don't want to have this conversation.
J: You're gonna end up just like your father and me with the booze
Mother (in the background): You know, I've been trying not to say anything, but you really have put on too much weight
HELLO, you fuckers. Wasn't it you who less than two years ago harped at me to start eating again when I was 80lbs at 5-foot-7 and was getting ready to die? Did you want me to live just so you could have me to control for a few more years? J, do you really think you should be telling a former anorexic that she's fat and needs to give up therapy and push herself away from the table? And, but the way, the reason I looked so good when I was coming off that plane was because I HADN'T EATEN FOR WEEKS. Didn't you people fuck with me enough when I was a kid and you told me how disgusting and stupid I was and how no one wants to be seen in public with me? Fuck you people. I'm 25 goddamn years old now, not some sniveling kid and you can go pound sand. I wan't my father back. He never said shit to me, never called me stupid or ugly or fat, and you, you bitch, drove him into his grave. Who wouldn't be driven to drink when they were married to someone who screamed at them everyday "I CAN'T WAIT TILL YOU DIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!" No wonder he beat the shit out of you. You deserved it. And if I wasn't so brainwashed I'd beat the shit out of you too.
So I get a call from my uncle, *again*. It starts off fine, but then degenerates into something like this ....
J: So how much do you weigh now?
Me: J, I love you, I really do, but that's not really any of your business.
J: Damn right it's my business. I know what your problem is ...
Me: No, it's not really your business.
J: Your problem is all in your head. You don't need that therapist. What you need is to push yourself away from the table.
Me: Jimmy, I love you, but you're being really insulting right now.
J: You need to get back to where you were a couple years ago when I met you coming off the plane. You looked great.
Me: J, I really don't want to have this conversation.
J: You're gonna end up just like your father and me with the booze
Mother (in the background): You know, I've been trying not to say anything, but you really have put on too much weight
HELLO, you fuckers. Wasn't it you who less than two years ago harped at me to start eating again when I was 80lbs at 5-foot-7 and was getting ready to die? Did you want me to live just so you could have me to control for a few more years? J, do you really think you should be telling a former anorexic that she's fat and needs to give up therapy and push herself away from the table? And, but the way, the reason I looked so good when I was coming off that plane was because I HADN'T EATEN FOR WEEKS. Didn't you people fuck with me enough when I was a kid and you told me how disgusting and stupid I was and how no one wants to be seen in public with me? Fuck you people. I'm 25 goddamn years old now, not some sniveling kid and you can go pound sand. I wan't my father back. He never said shit to me, never called me stupid or ugly or fat, and you, you bitch, drove him into his grave. Who wouldn't be driven to drink when they were married to someone who screamed at them everyday "I CAN'T WAIT TILL YOU DIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!" No wonder he beat the shit out of you. You deserved it. And if I wasn't so brainwashed I'd beat the shit out of you too.
